By Lisa Boonstoppel-Pot

You sit down for a minute with acoffee and think, “I’ll just watch a few videos” and next thing you know, the coffee is cold and you’ve wasted an hour. It’s not just teenagers who can’t resist the lure and addictive qualities of reels.
It was on one of these non-scheduled squanderings that I happened upon a video by The Hoof GP (GP stands for Graeme Parker) who runs the largest agricultural YouTube channel in the world. He does this, unbelievably, by sharing videos of hoof trimming.
Yep. Manure covered hooves. Abscesses. Fistulas. White line disease. Toe necrosis. Digital dermatitis. You see it all in gory detail as he grinds, slices, and shaves dairy and beef cow hooves in his native country of Scotland. Honestly, I was hooked! And it’s not like I haven’t seen this before, growing up on a dairy farm. 
When I think back, it was fascinating even then. A skilled hoof trimmer makes it look so simple…that knife slicing through the hoof likes it’s butter, carving off thick and thin slices of hoof until the two claws are balanced, allowing a cow to walk on her toes to prevent bruising and lameness.
Parker does all this with a running commentary in a Scottish accent. Since launching his YouTube channel and Facebook accounts, he has pulled in a combined total of three million subscribers and has had an incredible 2.1 billion views between the two sites.
He receives around 5,000 to 7,500 comments per day from his agricultural and non-agricultural fans which his wife Ashley monitors alongside the paperwork.
In the last 14 years, The Hoof GP has trimmed the feet of 200,000 dairy and beef cows throughout Scotland and England. He now works in a 25-mile radius from his home near Wigtown in South West Scotland.
Parker weaves an interesting commentary through each procedure and he’s a skilled movie editor. He often starts with a quick reel of a pus-filled, bloody, disgusting hoof, then teases with a comment such as “this might be the worst infection I’ve ever seen” before the videos launches with views of the Scottish countryside. Next, we’re in a barn and watching him explain why hoof trimming is important as he uncovers a tiny black hole in the hoof. It looks like nothing but anticipation rises as he says the cow is lame and he wonders, out loud, what he’s going to discover under the hoof wall. Pretty soon you’re peering closely at the  screen and there it is, a spray of pus. Then he finds the abscess and you almost want to cheer! 
Next you get totally grossed out as he keeps slicing and grinding to remove any loose hoof material. Sometimes half the hoof is gone before he gets it all. It’s astonishing how much he can carve away before he hits the sole corium. Corium is responsible for making new sole horn, it is prone to damage, leading to bruising, sole ulcers and white line haemorrhage. Sometimes he accidentally hits it and says, “there we have some claret showing”. Claret, I take it, is Scottish slang for blood.
The man’s Scottish accent is part of the appeal, I’m sure. He’s engaging, attractive and you feel like you’re really learning about hoof health and care.  But nothing is as gripping as wondering what he’s going to discover next as he cuts into those hooves.
The only thing really bothersome is his penchant for marketing his own hoof glue, a vivid green that matches the “crush” the cows stand in while getting trimmed. We’d call it a chute. But hey…if I had his reach, I’d probably be trying to sell something too.
He’s proud of his work, saying “Imagine going to work knowing you are going to make animals more comfortable at the end of the day; you’re going to help farmers run their farms more efficiently and you’re going to earn a living wage to feed, house and clothe your family. I truly love this job.” Now imagine that in a Scottish accent.
We keep getting told to share stories of our farm lives on social media and this guy proves why it is so valuable. He explains how the ulcers/injuries/diseases happen, credits farmers for taking care of their animals, shows the grossest of the gross, and gives the viewer a happy ending with the bandaged cow walking off with a block on its hoof (to keep the hoof raised to reduce pressure and keep it cleaner) to join the herd. I’m a farmer myself yet I find myself with a heightened appreciation for farmers and trimmers after watching the videos.
Check it out. It’s as gross as the Pimple Popper yet way more satisfying. And it’s making agriculture look good.
Awareness of the Hoof GP is my gift to you this season as an opportunity to share with your urban family members and initiate a conversation.
 I wish all The Rural Voice readers a Merry Christmas!◊